Journal

Lately, it feels like I’ve been having miscommunication after miscommunication—both in my personal life and in my business. It’s made me think a lot about why I’ve always been so obsessive about communication with my clients. If you’ve booked a Pittsburgh boudoir photography session with The Girlfriend Experience Boudoir, you’ve probably noticed it almost immediately. The emails start showing up. Then another. Then another.

You know what’s happening next.
You know how to prepare.
You know who’s going to be in the studio.
You know where to park.
You know what to bring.
You know what happens if you’re running late.
You know where the bathroom is before you’ve even walked through the front door.

None of that is accidental.

I believe a huge part of feeling confident about boudoir photography has nothing to do with lingerie or posing. It starts with knowing you’ve chosen someone who has already thought through every detail before you ever arrive.

Maybe that’s just good customer service. Maybe it’s also a trauma response.

I don’t handle uncertainty particularly well. I’m a Sagittarius. Apparently I’m supposed to thrive on spontaneity and adventure. Instead, I’m indecision wrapped in fear. When I designed my business fifteen years ago, I knew one thing for certain: I couldn’t allow my clients to spiral before their session.

A Pittsburgh boudoir experience already asks a lot of you. You’re trusting a stranger with your body, your insecurities, and photographs you’ll likely keep for decades. The least I can do is remove every unnecessary unknown.

Every Email Has a Purpose

Some people probably think my communication is excessive. That’s okay. Personally, if I’m about to get mostly naked in front of someone I’ve never met before, I’d appreciate a little warming up.

The emails are the warm-up. The photoshoot is the easy part. From the moment you walk through our studio door—which is honestly the hardest part of the entire day—I’ve got you. I’ll tell you what’s happening before it happens. I’ll direct every movement. I’ll adjust your hands, your shoulders, your chin, your expression. You’ll never be expected know how to move. You’ll never be expected to know how to emote. You’ll never hear me say, “Just act natural.”

Instead, I’ll guide you the way a director guides an actor through a scene. Your only job is to trust the process and enjoy the ride.

That’s what fifteen years of photographing women has taught me. Oh…and I just remembered I need to add snacks to the shopping list.

When Preparation Isn’t Enough

This week I had an experience that completely drained me. A client didn’t arrive for her 9:00 a.m. session. By 9:30 I called to check on her. She was still asleep and insisted her appointment was scheduled for 1:00 p.m. Never in my career. We’ve photographed at 9:00 and 11:00 for over twelve years. We flirted with 10:00 once. It didn’t stick.

During our phone call, we rescheduled her for 11:00 the following morning. Later that day she checked her email. She found every confirmation showing 9:00 a.m. She apologized and admitted something that caught me off guard.

She didn’t read them.

The next morning she called from the street because she couldn’t find the studio. I’ll admit—we don’t have signage. That’s intentional. We don’t accept walk-ins, and over the years we’ve had enough uncomfortable encounters that I prefer keeping the entrance discreet. The directions are sent in your one-week reminder email. The one she hadn’t read.

I watched from the window, directed her to the entrance, and Dessa welcomed her inside while I finished photographing the client who had arrived on time for her own 9:00 appointment.

When I finally spoke with the 11:00 client, she looked at me admitted she was brutally hungover. By then it was almost 1:00 in the afternoon.

I did what I could. I’m really good at what I do. She held on, sipped a soda. We worked until it became obvious she wasn’t going to have the experience either of us wanted. Forty minutes later we wrapped.

She told me she’d probably need to book another session. She felt awful. Literally. I walked away feeling exhausted.

Why I Built My Business This Way

There’s an expression entrepreneurs hear all the time:

“You eat what you kill.”

If you’re not marketing, creating, networking, editing, emailing, following up, or learning, you’re probably not getting paid.

Owning a small business means wearing every hat. Mastering your craft isn’t enough anymore. Neither is offering good customer service once. You have to deliver it over and over again, even on the days someone no-shows, gets lost, forgets to read their emails, or arrives too hungover to finish the session. That’s why the systems behind my business matter so much.

Every automated email. Every reminder. Every checklist. Every timeline.

Every piece of communication exists so that, when you’re finally standing in front of my camera, I can give you one hundred percent of my attention.

You only have one job that day. Show up. I’ve already spent weeks or sometimes months preparing you for the rest. Some people will always think it’s too much. I respect that. There are plenty of oldest daughters who don’t need me holding their hand.

But for everyone else—for the women who are nervous, overwhelmed, excited, uncertain, or simply appreciate knowing what’s coming next—that preparation is part of the experience. The photographs are what you’ll take home.

The preparation is how I make sure you enjoy the experience of creating them.

And if you’re looking for a Pittsburgh boudoir photography experience that feels thoughtful from your very first inquiry until the day your artwork is hanging on your wall, that’s exactly how I’ve designed this business.